We here at UoM are willing to spare no effort to please the Bloggernacle. In order to get a partial agenda for April's General Conference, we roughed up a doorman, impersonated the corpse of Leonard Arrington, and distracted the Strengthening the Members Committee with a delicious slice of heresy
Without further ado, your prophetic counsel for the New Year!
Jeffrey R. Holland: "Just Lose The Weight"
Thomas Monson: "Books Were Written. Knowledge Was Shared. Intellectuals Were Excommunicated."
Bonnie Parkin: "No Man Knows My Family History"
Dieter Uchtdorf: "Obedience: The First Law of the Reich of Heaven"
Henry B. Eyring: "Science and Religion Reconciled: A Literal Interpretation of the Book of Genesis"
Boyd K. Packer: "For Young Men Only: Nocturnal Emissions and Salvation"
James Faust: "Did I Ever Tell You About My Last Name?"
Richard Scott: "I Cut So That I Can Feel"
M. Russell Ballard: "Really, I Meant It. No More Travelogues."
Gordon B. Hinckley: "Even I've Given Up On This War"